of bridal showers and motorcycle rides

today was a wonderful day.

i drove on the freeway completely confident, went to one of my best friends' bridal shower, then came home {listening to EFY music just so you know} and not even five minutes after getting home from that, my best friend with the motorcycle shows up!

we talked and then he gave me a ride up and around my neighborhood. i loved the feel of the wind on my arms and the feeling that the only thing keeping me from flying away were my own arms holding on tightly around his waist. i loved it when he called me a "bobble-head" because his helmet is a bit too large and heavy for my own head. i love his hair after it's worn that helmet and it's all flattened and soft looking. and i love him.

and even if that is the only good that i have today, it will have been an absolutely wonderful day. i am lucky to have so many good people in my life. i hope they all know how truly blessed i feel.

people watching again. it's an addiction.

so wherever i find myself in life, i have always enjoyed one thing. people watching. whether it be the happy children playing in the leaves or the two teenagers obviously in love but who never seem to look at the right moment.

today i had a golden one. i took their order, a young couple with two little boys under the age of four and one baby in a car seat. they didn't order much, in fact they ordered one of our cheapest things. but they were nice. when their pizza was done at last, i brought their dipping sauces out with the help of one of the other girls bringing out their order.

they were so wonderfully happy. the wife was talking animatedly with her husband and it struck me in one phrase. they were best friends. they looked so simply and wonderfully happy. and maybe nothing was going right for them financially, or maybe they just weren't very hungry. but their happiness of contagious.

i even told one of the other girls i work with to take a peek and she agreed. they were definitely in love and even more so, best friends.

and i'm not entirely sure why that made me so happy, but it did. i want to be married someday like that, to my best friend. and i'm sure, we will only grow in love together. and i am so excited.

the end. so there's my people-watching story of the day for you.

summer nights

i feel as if my summer has gone by in weekends, not full weeks. because when i'm with him? that is when i am happiest.

we hiked to the top of the payson mountain and watched the sunset, just like our first real date. the one i wrote in my journal about...the time when i realized some important things might really change for me that year. they did.

it's been odd going to the same activities that i did last summer, this time i know the people a lot better. they have become my friends. and one of them told me the other night that...although he may never see me again, he wanted me to know that he respects me.

and sometimes it makes me wish we could live our lives full of summer nights, where nothing changes and time stands still for just a while.

because i'm really going to miss them all. so much...

we watched fireworks, my friends and i. they were beautiful and the boom they made my chest was lovely. i think i will make it a tradition to go watch those fireworks, but always with friends. i think they make it the best.

afterward we went and got ice cream. since the soft ice cream was closed {bummer} we got a large tub of cookies'n'cream. best decision ever. and then we ate it on a friend's front lawn, talking and laughing. i wish more than anything to always remember those nights. because even when things aren't perfect...they're still so beautiful.

and then i watched the beginning of the meteor shower. and there were so many of them, and yes i missed some and he missed some but we caught some together. and i don't know what it is...but it's one of those things that makes life so wonderful.

and maybe i need a squirt gun...

but i have never been happier.

nothing interesting. i pinky swear.

have you ever noticed that a post is usually much more interesting or inviting if you have a picture to go along with it? i have. especially on my blog dashboard reader where i can skim over the interesting titles and such of each recent post of all my blogs i follow. i usually will skip right over the ones without a picture because honestly...words are so boring looking.

so here. enjoy that.

oh and have you ever noticed the beauty of getting the things done that you said you would? take me for instance. my sprinklers spray nasty hard water all over my windshield at night and then the hard minerals get fried to the melted sand {also known as glass} and make it impossible to see and thus making it 60% more likely that i will be in an accident. but, guess who took the initiative and sprayed her windows with vinegar and then wiped them down again with windex.

i love sparkly, visible-through car windows. happiness right there.

oh and also coming home and realizing your sister gave you a drink without making you pay her for it. that was nice and very refreshing, even if it had bananas in it {because everyone knows that bananas are way too heavy to be in drinks...silly...}

and i've decided that basketball shorts and flip flops are the best combination for an afternoon off work. i didn't realize that not being able to wear shorts to work would be so hard for me. it is very very hard for me.

one of my brother's best friends and one of my best friend's brother is back from Indonesia. my family will be going to his homecoming talk this sunday and i am so very very excited. and nervous. i get nervous going to that ward due to bad memories of one red-haired boy and being surrounded by far too many cheerleaders who helped me make my life miserable.

i think that will be an interesting story. but i guess we shall see.

guess who got two dollars in tips today. yah i know not very much but it still made me happy. if i get another tip tomorrow night and the night after that i might go and buy myself a calzone. they smell good and they are much cheaper than buying a whole pizza.

getting my food handler's permit is so tedious. i hate that i had to pay $26 for that silly course.

there's going to be a meteor shower on sunday and monday night. i wish it were saturday night, because i really like watching shooting stars with my best friend.

i'm sure that those are all the random thoughts i have had today {besides the fact that i need to go do my laundry but you really didn't care to know that, did you.} so i hope you enjoyed that. and if not, that's okay too. i usually write for myself, and sometimes for you.

but today i was just writing to write.

and like i said - nothing interesting. i pinky swear.

hold my hand.

sometimes...there are moments in our life that make everything just, collide. everything in the universe just comes together in that one brief moment

and you're happy.

so happy that it's just....joyous. you feel the love for that person just overcoming you. you want to hold them and never let go. they are your best friend and you theirs and your wants and desires no longer matter because honestly...they are all in hoping and serving and helping their hopes and dreams come true, and it's beautiful because they feel the same way too...

and all you did...?

was finally hold his hand.

a story in pictures: graduation

stories in books are often boring without pictures. and since there's nothing much to tell about this story other than...it happened! i will show you my collages of it and hope you enjoy.

so...ONCE UPON A TIME...

THE END

or is it?

waiting.

four years and five months. i can wait. i know i can. he's my best friend.

i can see it being really hard. and at those hard times looking at his picture...wherever i may have it with me {not sure how i'm going to do that one but i'll work it out}and thinking of all the love that we share. thinking of how he is truly the best friend i have ever had here on earth. the only person i trust more than him? is the Lord.

someday, i want to wear a white dress and come walking out of those doors. i want to have my bride's maids wearing whatever they can find that's blue and yellow. i want lots of white and peach colored roses and a simple and easy wedding reception.

i want to have small children, clean their sticky hands and teach them all that i know to be true. i want to teach them to discover and to create and to become. i want to be that mother who is kind and gentle and loving.

someday i want to grow old and die. i want to die not a moment before him and as soon as possible after him, so that we are never far apart.

maybe this is...difficult to imagine me saying this. i know i have been changing and fickle before. i know i have said i have fallen in love before. but never has anyone brought out the good in me more than him. never has anyone been worthy to make me feel so happy as i do.

and so? i'm waiting. although without a promise...i am waiting.

and while i am waiting, i'll be living and learning and growing. and loving. always loving him.

always.

because let's face it. we love our chick-flicks.

jane eyre

stardust

{ps - i could probably quote this one to you. i did use it as an audition monologue one time after all. lovely isn't it? i think so.}

affair to remember

pride and prejudice

clicky on THIS LINK because every video clip i found of this scene was prohibited from embedding. gr. frustrating.

wives and daughters

Princess Bride

War and Peace

Tangled

i think that's enough for now, don't you? oozing sappiness right now.

yah. i like my chick-flicks.

it snowed again.

it snowed two days ago. and i forgot to tell you, we went and walked in the snow. it was lovely. i've never been happier in my entire life.

imagine what it would feel like to be in love with your best friend.

then imagine them loving you back, just as much.

and then add snow.

and then add the sweetest gray sky, a long cold walk {which leaves your heart achingly warm}, the silence left by winter, a childhood soccer field and playground, and a secluded bench surrounded by scrub oak

and last but most definitely not least, add a hug from someone dear and special.

please, let this always be mine.

What Matters?

“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.” Dr. Seuss

this is the quote and the thought that goes through my mind when i hear girls whispering and then pointing at me and then after realizing i saw that...pretend they're commenting on something else, quite randomly. not gonna lie, it makes me smile.

because i don't mind.

i'm happy. in fact, i wish everyone had what i have. knowledge of exactly who i am. no hate for a single soul out there. a best friend. someone to love. people who love me too. and all the chicken corn chowder that i could ever possibly desire.

if life could remain as beautiful as it is right now, i would say i were in paradise...but then...i'm not, as technically, literally, i live in Elk Ridge and not Paradise which apparently is located in Cache Valley. hm.

arms

arms...

that are strong

and sweet as sunshine.

gentle as a breeze

fortifying like a tree

with deep roots.

more careful

as if i were a child.

loving when i could

never understand.

the ambition of

a thousand souls

and patient...

for a heart that's been sewn

mis-matched together

again.

maybe...

it's not the arms

but the person

to whom they belong

and maybe...

because i love him too

he could hold me there

forever.

if i were the kind of girl to write sappy letters

this would be one of them.

but i generally don't see myself as that kind of person

so this isn't.

but if it were, i'd tell him how much i love him

and how i've never loved anyone quite like this before

i'd tell him how i've always been afraid

but when he holds me in his arms, i've never had so much faith

there'd be a few jokes in there about french kisses and awkward photos

maybe a line or two about happiness as well

i might talk about dreams and lists and wishes

or maybe a small rant on how birthday candles never brought me

what i really wanted - "till there was you."

there'd probably be some entries from my journal

about how much i missed the person i'd never even met

i'd laugh as i reminisced about our walk in the snow

and how i'm pretty sure he fell on purpose

hopefully he'd end up reading the part over and over again

where i tell him i've fallen in love with him

because it's true

and if i were more sappy i'd seal it with my love

and add {always} after that one word.

because i would. and it will be.

and that my friend... is the unromantic love letter.