a brother's advice.

my oldest brother is full of wisdom. and when we talk, i feel like he respects me and treats me the age that i am and with the responsibility that i should and try to have. i don't think i would be at my maturity level to the extent that i am, without him.

and today, we went for a walk. and we talked about relationships. and he {like so often before} opened my eyes to something i have overlooked.

and i feel empowered with that knowledge. the knowledge that i can determine my own destiny and where my life will go. and i can breathe so freely right now. and i am full of excitement, although nervous, at what could follow.

sometimes we have to take a leap, a risk and hope that these decisions that we make with our life will turn out for the best. but the Lord trusts us to use the intellect which He gave us. one who has to be commanded in all things is a slothful servant basically.

so i take my destiny into my hands.

we will see what happens. and i hope that i don't learn the hard way that what i want isn't always my best choice. but maybe, maybe it is what will eventually be the best for me. maybe i will grow all the more for reaching out and taking my destiny by the hand and guiding myself.

i can do this.

and i love my brother. i am constantly reminded of why i have always wanted to marry someone like him. and i hope that someday i do, and that he will love me. and i hope that we will be compatible and in love.

and that is all. {smile.}