hard.

the hardest part about saying goodbye to your best friend for two years is that your best friend isn't there to comfort you through the heartache.

i miss him. and people keep asking if i want to talk about it {the normal girl cure.} but i don't. i tell myself in my mind that it's okay. i'm stronger than this. because i am.

i'm so proud of my friend for serving the Lord. and i am doing everything i can to do the same. and i'm thankful that i had a friend who encouraged me to do just that. quite simply, i am happier than i have ever been. after all, he is serving the Lord. that doesn't mean we love each other any less, or that i won't ever see him again - because i will. and i keep my promises.

{i've even joked with him that even if i wanted to, i don't have time to find someone and get married before he gets back. it's chronically impossible.}

i love him. {and even though i'm not "waiting" for him} i'll see him again.

life is sneaky.

yes. i know it is passed midnight.

but after talking on the phone with a friend tonight it kind of hit me. i'm living the life i never thought i'd see. all my guys basically have their mission calls. my best friend who's a girl is now officially married. i'm an aunt. i'm less than a year away from my own mission {hopefully, fingers crossed}.

it's all just kind of...crazy.

i mean, i could be married in two and a half years. seriously. and a kid in at least four.

what?

that was not in the plan so soon. i wasn't going to get married for another four years. my whole life snuck up on me and i didn't even realize it.

and right now...i'm almost not sure what to do with myself. where did the time go? i have to get my wisdom teeth out soon? no!