Sunday, July 31, 2011

today.


today i cleaned dog pee and poo out of carpet. ugh.
today i helped teach six year olds sunday school. it was the best.
today i sat alone in the rain.
today i colored with markers like a kid again.
today i listened to calming music.
today i wore black and white, fearful shades of mourning.
today i threw everything out off my closet floor, locked myself in and sobbed.
today i prayed to the one person who i know always hears me.
today i wore the necklace given to me by grandma.
today i missed my grandma.
today i had more questions than there were answers for.
today i looked through pictures of last year.
today i wondered how life could change so much in so short a while.
today i missed my old friendship with brittani.
today i read through three months of meg's blog.
today my mom got mad at me and i wanted to run away.
today i realized it was just another thing that was my fault. again.
today i realized that some people make better friends than others.
today i realized i like sideburns on men.
today i felt intimidated by the other people in Singer's choir.
today i day-dreamed about seeing the ocean.
today i wished for a phone call conversation, and was disappointed.
today i blogged far more than was necessary for one day.
today i wrote posts that will probably never be posted.
today my hands stank of urine. dumb dog.
today i yelled at my brother over the phone. dumb pms.
today i nearly fell asleep in sacrament.
today i wondered why time zones work the way they do.
today i was lonely.
today i wished that i could share a sunset in it's full beauty with someone special.
today i wanted to have someone special again.
today i realized i was being stupid again.
today one person made me smile a real smile.
today i wanted to do something nice for someone, but didn't know where they lived.
today i really wanted an iTunes card so i could buy Katie Costello's album.
oh and today was mama v's, and aubri's birthdays.
today i wanted to sidewalk chalk something sweet on their driveways.
today it was pouring rain. but i already mentioned that.
today i wore bright red slippers.
today i decided that i would hike the "P" tomorrow rain or shine.
today i cried over hurtful words.
today i jumped on my mom and dad's bed.
today i cried way way way too much.
today my mom told me i'm not a drama queen. just a drama princess.
today i told you everything i did for absolutely no reason.

today you read this.

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